C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
i would punch a child for taco bell
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize
