do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Randomize
