Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
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