his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
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