My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Randomize
