My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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