She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize