Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
