I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize