Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Randomize
