Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
