I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize