You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
