For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I've blown a few things in my day
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize