Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Randomize
