I don't think brook has ever known best
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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