fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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