I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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