Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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