Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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