Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
