A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
