A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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