When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
