I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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