this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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