cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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