You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
