i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
