Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
