I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
operation harelip BJ is a go
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Randomize
