I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
