Small penises have feelings too.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
smell my finger.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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