I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
