i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
