I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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