And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
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