This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Randomize
