This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
