OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
