i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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