giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
