Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
