so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Randomize
