Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
