Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
