My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
