So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
