Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize
