So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
