Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
false alarm, still single
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
