If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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