Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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